Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Pet Peeves

Whenever I'm asked of my pet peeve, I usually fall stumped on the spot. In a painful effort to be clever or funny, I mumble something about people who don't put the cap back on the toothpaste tube or forget to change the toilet paper.

But I've decided to go on the record officially with my pet peeve: People who can't drive. Now, you are in this category if you have been caught going 69 in the left lane of a four-lane highway. If you have been a victim of an SUV on your tail (yes, we own the road), waving frantically, mouthing curse words and yelling "Get over!" while flashing its brights, it's a good chance you are a person who can't drive. (There's also a good chance I am the one behind you)

Yes you may be able to get from point A to point B, throwing your car into drive and obeying the general rules of stop lights and turn signals. However, you are likely to be an annoyance on the highway, four-lane, or two.

Note to you- when driving on a country road in optimum conditions, please allow those who tail-gate you to pass. They do not wish to trail your rear so closely for the smell of your emissions or to peer into your back seat to see what fast food trash you've tossed behind you. Rather, they want to get around you. If you are driving just slow enough to be below or barely at the speed limit, but fast enough that someone can't get around you before the next triangular "no-passing zone" sign, you are a person who cannot drive.

You are incapable of looking in your rear-view mirror. There is a reason highways post signs saying "Slower Traffic Keep Right."

If this is you, I make no apologies. Get out of the left lane. And happy driving!

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